~ Banterlude 2 ~

The Winter’s Tale of the Cyclist Versus the White Van Man

Cycling down Heaton Road in Newcastle today. Heaton has a new cycle lane which starts at the side of the road and then moves onto the pedestrian footpath. I chose not to follow it onto the footpath and stayed on the road instead. A white van driver beeps and revs behind me. 

White Van Man [as he overtakes]: FUCKING CYCLE PATH! 

Me [shouting after him]: IT’S TOO ICY TO USE! 


Me [catching up with him at the lights]: No, not fuck off mate – it’s too icy to use the cycle path. Would you really rather I fell off my bike on that path just so you could get to the lights a bit quicker? 

WVM: The Council have spent millions on that cycle path, and you’re not fucking using it! 

Me: It’s too icy to cycle on it today mate! 

WVM: No it’s not, look, there’s nothing wrong with it. 

Me: And how would you know, do you ride a fucking bike yourself? 

WVM: What you swearing for? 

Me: Because you don’t even think, you’re just getting angry at me for no reason! 

WVM: What you swearing for? 

Me: You started it mate! 

WVM: What you swearing for? [Drives off] 

Me: 😒 


31 January, 2019 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s