~ Banterlude 10 ~

I’m cycling down Buxton Road in Macclesfield, Cheshire. This road is always hammered with cyclists ascending the popular Cat & Fiddle climb and I’ll never know why, it’s a horrendous road to cycle. Anyway, in the other direction come two cyclists, single file, overtaking a row of parked cars. And a car is overtaking them. It’s OK though, there’s room.

What there’s not room for, is the motorcyclist that overtakes the car overtaking the bikes overtaking the parked cars. Nearly clipping me off my bike on the other side of the road.

That motorcyclist be just 🤪

I wouldn’t have mentioned the above incident though – it’s not particularly entertaining nor sensational – had it not been for the fact that it happened just up the road from this cracker from last year that I’ve been dying to bring back to the feed.

~ Banterlude 1~

(a throwback from 12.01.19)

Some pals of ours wanted to give their five-year-old son some practice riding his bike. We found a short route taking in mostly backroads and connecting up their house with a local climbing wall. What a joyous way to travel! we thought, pedalling in a protective V formation with his two-year-old sister in a seat on the back of her mum’s bike.

We hit a junction with a no-stopping box and wanted to turn right. Traffic was queuing from our right on the road we were attempting to join because of a red light at a pedestrian crossing to our left. No one was stopped in the no-stopping box, naturally*. (Take ten seconds to visualise this road layout so you can really appreciate the mania of what happens next).

*In UK road infrastructure, a ‘no-stopping box’ is what it says on the tin. You’re not supposed to stop in it.

The vehicle waiting at the lights behind the no-stopping box is a red Range Rover.

Hubs sees an opportunity for us to cross while the lights are on red so dismounts his bike at the other side of the road to act as a crossing guard. Range Rover Rob doesn’t like this (even though he’s not going anywhere anyway) and attempts to move into the no-stopping box to block us. He’s too late though and we start making the crossing.

The crossing only serves to make him crosser. RRR winds down his window as if to shout something but hubs beats him to it with “mate, you’re stuck in traffic, and you can see we’re trying to cross the road with young children, so just cool it yeah?”.

This does not sit well with RRR, who’s face turns a similar colour to his paintwork. After a second or so, he leans out of his window and bellows:

“PEASAAANTS!”

And words fail me, even for a Cheshire Range Rover driver 👏👏👏

Now do you understand why I don’t like SUVs??

8 August, 2020

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